Saturday, February 14, 2009

A difference between boy and girls..

On the way home from school yesterday, after the obligatory exchange of Valentine's and "healthy" snacks in their individual 5th grade classes, my daughter and her friend quickly began to assess their Valentine cornucopia with much excitement and vigor in the back seat of our truck. Who gave what to whom and why was a big topic of conservation between the two of them. Did any particular Valentine from any specific boy have special "meaning"? How were they signed, neatly? Quickly? Were the cards homemade? Expensive? What kind of treats were given? All could be signals that some cute boy might like you.

The night before these festivities, my daughter had painstakingly chosen and addressed each one of her Valentine's with great care. Reserving the more special ones for kids, more specifically boys, that she liked.

I had no idea it was so complicated.

My son, who is now in high school, never cared about such things. In fact, when he was in elementary school, I had to do his Valentines every year, and force him to sign them. After the parties were over, he would immediately take the candy off any obvious girl card, you know the one's with a barbie or Disney princess on them, and throw the card away, or it up in front of them at school. Ugh. Great.

What had I done to raise such a monster? tsk. tsk.

The same thing happened to me in second grade. I was, of course totally in love with a boy in my class, Jeff Rich was his name. Ah, he could sing like an angel and I got much exercise trying to catch him during recess kiss tag. I'd made a special Valentine just for him. The nervousness, the unbridled excitement that filled me when I finally had enough courage to hand it to him was almost overwhelming, and what did he do? He ripped it up in front of me.

Sometimes a heart can be torn as easily as paper. Crushed. Traumatized. Depressed. That's probably why I still remember it.

Was this boy a monster too? Or are boys just different than girls in regards to love and expressions of it?
Who knows, but as I see the differences in my children, and I look at my husband, and the fact that he will probably forget to get me a Valentine's card, I will try to remember that the sexes are different.

Do we females expect too much?


Bryce and Mandy said...

I love the quote at the top. Very accurate. :)

I remember trying to pick out the perfect Valentine when I was little for the kids in my class. The nicer ones for the boys I liked and the neutral ones for the boys I didn't like so they wouldn't think I liked them. It was a very complicated process!

I have tried to train my husband to get me a card for my birthday and Valentine's Day. And even then I usually have to drop a hint for him. He doesn't care about cards but for me, it is the most important part.

I don't think we as women ask too much. It's not like I am asking for diamond jewelry. Just a $2.00 card and I am happy :)

Peter said...

I'm terrible at presents, etc. but I'm pretty good at the romance department. Made a crab and lobster gratin tonight, served as close as I could to the wine we had when I proposed, and made a music mix reflecting the years we've been married.

Bryce and Mandy said...

Wow!!! Color me impressed! A man who makes dinner... sigh... :)

Lula O said...

I've gone from expecting less to expecting more!

A music mix? Wow, that's awesome. No wonder she let's you keep the seat up.

The Bradfords said...

Love the quote at the top--that will be my new philosophy concerning this "celebration"????

I know I'm late responding, but after all these years (even going back to my elementary school days), I have given up on the men in my life (except my dad) doing what I want them to do on Valentine's Day. So this year I told my husband exactly what I wanted and that's exactly what I got and I LOVE IT! He gets a little mad if I actually go buy my own present so I try not to do that, but I'm much happier getting what I want. I figured out long ago that he cannot read my mind no matter how hard I try to send him vibes. My present this year? I told him I want him to make me a CDmix of songs that remind him of me. It turned out to be 4 CDs long, and I'm loving every minute of them.

My darling dad sent me a card with a check again this year. I can always count on him, and the simplicity of the action makes it all the better.

Lula O said...

Any Barry White on those cd's?